Coffee punishment with puns

Never understood slight.

A slight joke, a slight mistake or a girl who tells you she is slightly pregnant.

How distant is distant?  Keep your distance for example.  A block, twelve feet or a continent away.

If  the future is a second away by the time you read this you are in the future.

If E equals mass squared then it is okay to be squared.

Can square dances be held on a circular floor?

Can you be positive if you have an ex in your life.  I am positive I have an ex.

If you age slower in space then Ponce De Leon should have gone there instead of traveling around Florida.

Is Bernie Sanders related to Colonel Sanders.

I loved it when fried became a negative and Kentucky Fried Chicken became KFC.

Is it a good year when you buy goodyear tires?

Is it a bad year when they grow bald?

Stress related is thinking of all the bills you have paid and yet they still come in day after day.

Ever pay bills a bit at a time.  The interest kills you and yet you show no interest.

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