The cranberry scare.

 

We have all sorts of scares.  The bumps in the night and the monster in the closet.  But there are real scares out there.  E coli is a monster which does exist.  This has been around forever.  But at Thanksgiving I always drift back to another scare.  The Cranberry scare of 59.  Here is the FDA warning.

The Food and Drug Administration today urged that no further sales be made of cranberries and cranberry products produced in Washington and Oregon in 1958 and 1959 because of their possible contamination by a chemical weed killer, aminotriazole, which causes cancer in the thyroids of rats when it is contained in their diet, until the cranberry industry has submitted a workable plan to separate the contaminated berries from those that are not contaminated.

 

The public heeded the announcement and many a table was without cranberries.  

Imagine what it would be like if there was a Tom scare.

Alas poor Tom, you have been called by the bell of death and you shall trot to your execution with strides of dignity. 

But imagine Gobblers have been contaminated by eating improper crap and therefore we should avoid turkey on this Thanksgiving.

That would certainly pull the ham string as thousands more hams would hit the market.

Tufu turkey might also increase.

I always found it to be laughable that the President grants a pardon for a couple of birds at this time.  Millions are slaughtered and two are granted life.

It should also be noted that at one time the turkey was inconsideration to be the national bird over the eagle. But the eagle won.  Imagine if it were the other way. The national bird is the turkey and we eat eagle on Thanksgiving.

Somewhere there is a farmer sharpening his axe.  He walks to the barn and there commits an act of violence.  Then the body is open up and stuffed, then cooked and then ripped apart as it is savagely eaten.  The only revenge the turkey has is the overweight person carrying a ton of turkey meat around and having a slight case of indigestion.

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