Fun with Words and strange thoughts

Vegetarians came up with a plan to end the slaughtering of animals for food. They got scientist to teach the cows how to say Jesus and the turkey and the chicken too.

They succeeded and instead of saying Moo the cow said Jesus. Since the cow was now saying the name of the Lord people stopped eating the animal. The same with the turkey and the chicken. A few animals refused to learn and they became the dinner plate special. Amen brother, and femen, sister.

If a Black Man marries a Chinese Woman and has a boy. Then a White Man marries a Hawaiian Woman and they have a girl. This boy and girl get married and have a child who is Black, White, Chinese and Hawaiian. If that child has to fill out forms what does the child put for ethnic.

How does a quarter horse run when there is only a quarter of him?

Remember when the expression was “a nickel for a pickle?” There were five and dime stores and gasoline was under a $1.00? Remember when there was Wonder Bread? Boy time does move on.

I am dyslexia and therefore I mix up numbers. In an emergency I dial 191 instead of 911 and no one comes. I never could get a job delivering pizzas for I would mix up the addresses. I had so many girls who I could have taken out on a first date but I mixed up their addresses.

I had a party and hired two servers. One had the A tray and the other had the B tray. But the Betray served pigs in blankets and the A tray served blankets without pigs. People liked the B tray better. Go figure.

When people get frustrated with their accountant do they tell him to go figure?

Do IRS people have nice IRA’s and are they named Ira?

How simple is Simon and what does he do at the fair? Is he a baker? What kind of pies does he bake? If it is simple as apple pie, or tart or you do not give a fig?

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